Category: wordplay

My uncle died in his canoe when a strong current took him away. Water way to go.

It’s my first night inside. Usually I have to dry-hump the wife.

An eldely priest walks into a bar full of atheists. The barman says “Why the long faith?”

The general public really seem to have it in for me today, Or the Jury as they are meant to be called…

Could Tom run out of petrol? No, but Jerry can.

I love my foot. What a legend.

Laura Robson is bringing a whole new meaning to the phrase ’15 love’.

These two random people stopped me in the street today asking me to work out corners of these triangles. What was their angle?

BBC News: Miners & children trapped down a mine in china seems as though we have a case of ‘anything you can do we can do better’

I had a threesome with two eastern europian girls yesterday, It made me feel like a professional ski-er Going in and out of poles

My huge, solid gold ring makes quite an impression on the ladies. Usually around the forehead and jaw.

I’m tRNA get an A in my biology test

I’ve just spent 15,000 on hiring a contract killer. It’s cheaper than paying the early release fee from Vodafone.

I like to go out in my horse costume and try it on with the ladies.

I ordered myself a slow cooker online last week. It’s already three days late.