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Category: people

Gingers are a lot like si …

November 4qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Gingers are a lot like si …

Gingers are a lot like silver X-box live. They get around and talk but they never get invited to parties.

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Why is it when you run in …

October 9qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Why is it when you run in …

Why is it when you run into a spider web, you suddenly turn into a ninja?

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There are those who think …

September 15qjoq.comLeave a Comment on There are those who think …

There are those who think they are better than others. Not me though, I’m above that sort of thing.

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“I’m not a taxi service!” …

September 13qjoq.comLeave a Comment on “I’m not a taxi service!” …

“I’m not a taxi service!” Yeah I know, and that’s why I’m not paying you.

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My girlfriend never went …

August 17January 1qjoq.comLeave a Comment on My girlfriend never went …

My girlfriend never went that ‘Extra Mile’ for me. So I got a Restraining Order, now she has to.

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I was once abducted by al …

August 16qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I was once abducted by al …

I was once abducted by aliens. They made me wipe my face, blow my nose and eat my greens. I think I was on board the mothership.

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putting a turtle neck jum …

August 14qjoq.comLeave a Comment on putting a turtle neck jum …

putting a turtle neck jumper on a bald person so he looks like a roll-on deodorant.

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‘Are you aware of the phr …

August 12January 1qjoq.comLeave a Comment on ‘Are you aware of the phr …

‘Are you aware of the phrase delusions of grandeur?’ ‘Yes, since I made it up.’

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If there’s one thing I ha …

July 17qjoq.comLeave a Comment on If there’s one thing I ha …

If there’s one thing I hate. It’s people who moan about other people.

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I had an accident three y …

June 8qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I had an accident three y …

I had an accident three years ago. He’s sitting next to me.

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I was driving north on th …

May 12qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I was driving north on th …

I was driving north on the m6 past Stafford, when I saw a sign reminding me to “Think Bike.” Ironically, at the very same time, I found myself thinking the words “Katie Price.” How odd.

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This year, there is no ex …

May 3qjoq.comLeave a Comment on This year, there is no ex …

This year, there is no excuse for people to say they haven’t been able to get that beach body they’ve wanted this summer. I’ve put a little flag in the sand on top of each one I buried. There’s hundreds. You’re welcome.

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Friends: Gods apology for …

April 27qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Friends: Gods apology for …

Friends: Gods apology for relations.

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Welcome to Schizophrenia …

April 2qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Welcome to Schizophrenia …

Welcome to Schizophrenia Anonymous, nice to see so many people here today…

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“Treat ’em mean, keep ’em …

February 6qjoq.comLeave a Comment on “Treat ’em mean, keep ’em …

“Treat ’em mean, keep ’em keen” or in other words; punch her in the face and she’ll stick around.

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