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Category: money

Money can’t buy happiness …

January 1 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Money can’t buy happiness …

Money can’t buy happiness… but I’d rather cry in a Ferrari.

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By using my employee disc …

December 6 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on By using my employee disc …

By using my employee discount at work I’ve managed to make a profit However, it turns out theres ‘No such thing’ as employees discount at the Bank of England and I am now in jail

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Why is it that people com …

November 23 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Why is it that people com …

Why is it that people complain about the amount of money that footballers get paid, then when they see them play they throw more money at them??

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So Nationwide have said t …

November 22 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on So Nationwide have said t …

So Nationwide have said that they were “disappointed” that it took six hours before someone reported that one of their cash machines was paying out too much money. I wonder if that is a different kind of “disappointed” felt by their customers with base rate tracker mortgages when they said they were not going to […]

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What do you find at the b …

November 19 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on What do you find at the b …

What do you find at the bottom of a Jewish wishing well? Dead Jews with broken rappels.

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I’m rich beyond my wildes …

November 17 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I’m rich beyond my wildes …

I’m rich beyond my wildest dreams. Although my dreams are far from wild.

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I’ve just got a doctors n …

November 8 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I’ve just got a doctors n …

I’ve just got a doctors note and have taken the rest of the day off work. It was a fifty, and that should keep me in beer all afternoon.

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My family are really poor …

October 25 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on My family are really poor …

My family are really poor. On my 12th birthday they put half a cake with six candles up against a mirror.

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I have just been down to …

October 22 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I have just been down to …

I have just been down to the Dale Farm Bureau de change. They do an excellent rate on travellers cheques.

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The phone bill was except …

October 5 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on The phone bill was except …

The phone bill was exceptionally high and the man of the house called a family meeting… Dad: People this is unacceptable. You have to limit the use of the phone. I do not use this phone, I use the one at the office. Mum: Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use […]

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I’ve just impressed a gir …

October 2 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I’ve just impressed a gir …

I’ve just impressed a girl online by telling her I’ve been offered a new job with a 10 figure salary. I love working in Zimbabwe.

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Now that I’m married, I k …

September 28January 1 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Now that I’m married, I k …

Now that I’m married, I keep a photo of my family where I used to keep my money when I was single.

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I don’t believe in change …

September 22 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I don’t believe in change …

I don’t believe in change, I pay the exact amount.

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I opted for a bit of chan …

September 8 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I opted for a bit of chan …

I opted for a bit of change in my life… So I went begging.

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So Ireland are bankrupt a …

August 18 qjoq.comLeave a Comment on So Ireland are bankrupt a …

So Ireland are bankrupt and they want the UK to bail them out. I’ll do my part by buying some guinness.

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