Category: wordplay

Msn News: Baby killed by falling branch, she had a savings account with Northern Rock

My wife’s always claiming she has a migraine but I’m not having any of it. I said to her, ‘It’s all in your head babe’.

I met my wife whilst we were both having a go on the Coconut Shy at the fairground. We hit it off immediately.

When telling me about his family’s trip to the zoo that day, my Jamaican friend said; “We saw a Tiger there today, it was Shere Khan”. I replied “What, from the Jungle Book?, why do you think it was Shere Khan?” He said “The zoo keeper told me it has Parkinsons”.

I was practicing my potting technique in the local snooker club yesterday when the manager approached me and said… “Get out and take that soil with you!”

I was going to make a herb garden the other day, but I just haven’t got the thyme.

Before my GCSE’s I drank pure alcohol. Then I got an ethanol my exams

A Man walks into a library and asks for a book on ‘diarrhea’ The Librarian says: ” Yes but half the pages are missing”

So i made a new book about herbal spiritualism, and a bunch of stoners already made a religion about it. They call it Bud-ism

BBC News: ‘A man is being sought after he was caught on CCTV appearing to dump a dog in Dorset’ Ouch.

I’m planning on being more spontaneous in the future.

My wife could suck a golf ball through a hose-pipe. We’ve got a really good hoover.

What do you call a girl with loads of nicknames? Moniker

I get violent towards my wife everytime I drink strongbow. Different cider me.

Hey Pope, TAG, you’re it!