Category: wordplay

I thought growing my own lettuce would be difficult but it was quite easy in the end. It’s not rocket science.

I think we should stop all these tumble dryer jokes before this all spins out of control…

I was paying for some beers, and the attractive cashier asked me to double-bag it. After a somewhat unfortunate misunderstanding, I was released on bail.

Feeling Suicidal? Come to Bridgend! Where you can “hang” around with like minded people.

One time when I was re-enacting the birth of Christ, I swear I saw the manger move by itself… Paranormal Nativity.

Invisible Calculators – I can’t see them working out

Out hunting pheasant yesterday but only managed to shoot a blackbird. Her name was Latoya, according to her driving licence

I pulled a muscle today I kept clam.

The art dealer told me to go and pick up his Monet. At first I didn’t have a clue what he was talking about, but now I get the picture.

eBay….. …..is what a Yorkshire man calls the coast

I’ve just cast my vote and I’m confident I’ve made the right decision. They’ve been seen to be tough on blacks and that’s good enough for me. Yup, Cheryl Cole got my backing for the FHM awards.

My antique Georgian mahogany writing desk has wormholes. I opened a drawer and ended up in the Nebula Galaxy.

I was sure my sister was going to pleased with the entertainment I’d booked for her 40th birthday, however when a guy turned up at the venue selling kebabs on the car park I knew there had been a big misunderstanding. But none of us went hungry, thanks to “Jasons’ donner van”

My Grandad always pinned a cheese cracker to his lapel when he went out. He loved putting on the Ritz.

“Is there a shorter way of writing ‘Number’?” “No.”