Category: wordplay

My new site dedicated to hitchikers is doing quite well. Everyone’s given it a thumbs up so far.

My son was killed by some bullies a few years ago… They fell on his head in a darts memorabilia shop.

I just bought my 6 month old son one of those baby bouncers. 10 an hour but he keeps the kid safe

I’ve just bet my brother a tenner that I can cross from one side of the river Thames to the other stood in a small boat using only a long stick to propel myself. It’s worth a punt.

I’m an incompetent engineer with no friends. I just can’t seem to build bridges.

To all those people in Third World countries that are ill through lack of water…. Hope you get well soon.

I put my house on the Market today. The stallholders were not very pleased.

What’s the name of a woman who can keep a secret? Chantelle.

What do you call a German with a bald head? Herr loss.

Why did the KFC box meal audition for X-Factor? It was a Wicked Zinger.

I was winding my girlfriend up the other day, In hindsight, I should have got a traditional inflatable plastic doll but no, I had to be different…

I always used to go and see my nan as a school boy. I used to tell her: “Nan, stop dressing as a school boy”.

I hate being in the spotlight, it’s really warm in there.

I knew it was time to stop pretending to be a fish, but I was hooked.

I joined a chocolate lovers forum the other day. I was asked if I liked a combination of chocolate, caramel, nougat and hazelnut. I said I used to but I no longer did. Then I was banned from the forum for going off topic.