Category: wordplay

A new Indian cafe just opened in my town. Well we did need a New Delhi..

Who is the Patron Saint of Australian problems? St. ruth

Raising pigs, pretty boaring work if you ask me.

The people in the pub laughed and thought that I was an idiot for putting ten grand on the world not ending today. They won’t be laughing tomorrow when the black man comes back giving me my twenty grand winnings.

Saw – The Uncut Version So, completely pointless then?

I gave this fit young bird a good seeing to last night There again, I am a CAT scan operator.

When making love, I prefer the missionary position. I think it’s the starving Africans that do it for me.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six offender.

Some little kid just ran up and shot me in the back of the head with a foam dart. I thought, “He’s got a nerf!”.

I’ve got a sure fire tip for you. The red bit on the end of a matchstick.

I think my wifes hallucinating, She keeps telling me she’s seeing other people.

I was thinking of trying to get across a body of water in Louisiana on foot, but I knew I would have to move quickly to avoid sinking, so I thought I’d check with my friend if he thought it was possible. I said- ”Right mate, so I’m going to run this bayou…..”

What’s pink and sounds terrible? Pink.

I watching the lightning out of my window last night, and I began to wonder how it all actually happens. Then it struck me.

Just met Darth Vader’s corrupt brother. Taxi Vader.