Category: wordplay

I tried taking a picture of a man with an artificial arm, but couldn’t. Maybe I should use a camera instead.

I wrote a song of celebration regarding the recent burial of Osama Bin Laden. Appropriately, I tuned my guitar to drop sea.

Admiral Carpets in Birmingham was looted during the riots. Police are said to be on the lookout for a rug dealer.

Time really flies! Today my four year old siamese twins were seperated. Seems like only yesterday that they were one.

My girlfriend was complaining that I never buy her anything meaningful, so I got her a dictionary.

As soon as the General walked in. There was a tension in the room.

Convicted “British” Paki drug-smuggler Akmal Shaikh thought he was getting death by ganja when the Chinese said “We gon’ gif you reefer injection”

My mate told me a new book has been published on gullibleness. I almost bought it.

The idea of perfume makes so much scents.

BBC News – “Lord made false claims”. Everyone knows that. As if he ‘made the World in seven days’.

I just bought stock in some company called Bose… I think it’s a sound investment.

There’s something long and hard in my trousers… ..My femur

For some unknown reason, my wife is still angry at me for showering naked on our wedding day. And anyway, confetti is not nearly as effective as water.

I just recieved an email: “Jack, Black Friday is coming to The Bookshop! Be ready!” Trust The Bookshop to hire Robinson Crusoe rejects.

I was fired from my job yesterday after a slip of the tongue during a one on one meeting. It turns out my female boss wasnt coming on to me after all.