qjoq.com – Page 1642

I went online shopping fo …

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I went online shopping for the wife today. thaibrides.com has a brilliant variety.

I don’t understand the pu …

I don’t understand the purpose of the line, “I don’t need to drink to have fun.” Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they’ve invented the lighter?

People kept telling me br …

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People kept telling me brown bread is healthier. Apparently buying a toaster was not the right idea.

I thought my family hated …

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I thought my family hated me – turns out they’ve all chipped in for me to visit a luxury clinic in Switzerland!

I don’t understand why th …

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I don’t understand why the Crossbow Cannibal left over so many body parts of his victims! Maybe he’d bitten off more than he could chew !

Either my dad thinks he’s …

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Either my dad thinks he’s Neil Buchanan or he’s having a heart attack.

Just read a book about yo …

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Just read a book about youth in Asia. Made me want to kill myself.

I hate that my dad is suc …

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I hate that my dad is such a playa. Makes me feel like a little son of a beach.

I own a restaurant sellin …

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I own a restaurant selling tyre soup We have a michelin star

I go out with a nice, fem …

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I go out with a nice, female, semi-aquatic mammal. She’s my significant otter.

I was telling my colleagues a hilarious story about the time me and my friends got locked in a room full of laughing gas. When I finished it was met with an awkward silence. You probably had to be there.