I have broken my leg 3 ti …
I have broken my leg 3 times in the same place now. I should probably stay away from there in future.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
As a hater of racism I wa …
As a hater of racism I wanted to purchase my own ‘Say No To Racism’ banner and when I checked it out they all look the same… Bit like Chinese people.
Continue ReadingSupermarkets say, they ar …
Supermarkets say, they are doing their best to stop obesity. If that was true they would have only made the biscuit isle a foot wide.
Continue ReadingMy god carries a hammer. …
My god carries a hammer. Your god died nailed to a piece of wood. Any questions?
Continue ReadingMy mate says he hates dod …
My mate says he hates dodgem cars and coconut shies. Which is a fair comment.
Continue ReadingYour Mum’s So Small, She …
Your Mum’s So Small, She Has To Slam Dunk Her Bus Fare!
Continue ReadingWhy did the chicken cross …
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who’s there? The Chicken.
Continue ReadingMy neighbours obviously r …
My neighbours obviously really enjoy my late night guitar playing. They smash my windows through, so they can hear me more clearly.
Continue ReadingMy mates just got back fr …
My mates just got back from his mission to construct the worlds largest paper airplane. He didnt make it.
Continue ReadingBBC News: Nine held over …
BBC News: Nine held over global iPhone scam. You mean the board of directors at Apple?
Continue ReadingWatching TV always remind …
Watching TV always reminds me of why I don’t watch TV.
Continue ReadingI like my women like I li …
I like my women like I like my washing machines. Can take a huge load and wash my clothes.
Continue ReadingI was fired from my job a …
I was fired from my job as a proof reader. They gave me the McCanns book, I couldn’t find any.
Continue ReadingI knew I shouldn’t have a …
I knew I shouldn’t have adopted those two pandas, they’re eating me out of house and home! I also shouldn’t have built my house out of bamboo.
Continue ReadingAt what age should I tell …
At what age should I tell my philosophies they’re adopted?
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