I have an invention that …
I have an invention that allows me to walk through Walls. It’s called a door.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I went to a job interview …
I went to a job interview the other day at the Airport, when the interviewer asked me about my interests. I was glad I managed to give a good first impression. “It says here in your interests that you like to walk the dog and that you also like to travel around the world!” he […]
Continue ReadingMy shrink told me I had a …
My shrink told me I had an avoidance personality disorder, I stopped seeing her.
Continue ReadingThe police banned journal …
The police banned journalists from the Joanna Yeates press conference? So, who exactly were they talking to?
Continue ReadingI was listening to music …
I was listening to music in my bedroom when my dog walked in on me practicing the robot. He’s actually getting pretty good at it.
Continue ReadingIt takes a lot of guts to …
It takes a lot of guts to eat as a much as I do.
Continue ReadingAccording to a report, wo …
According to a report, women speak in a higher voice when talking to men they fancy. I’v never heard that.
Continue ReadingMy girlfriend said that I …
My girlfriend said that I “don’t ever take anything in my life seriously”. “This is not true”, I said, “but I can’t prove you wrong right now, I have an important phone call to do”. “Who you gonna call?” she asked. “Ghostbusters”, I said and giggled. We had some beautiful times together…
Continue ReadingI’ve been getting really …
I’ve been getting really paranoid lately. Its got so bad, I’ve even closed my Twitter account because a policeman’s been following me.
Continue ReadingWhen I was young, I could …
When I was young, I could not understand why anyone would want to become a priest because you could not get married or have children. Now I am married with children, I can see the priesthood has its attractions.
Continue ReadingAll socks should be sold …
All socks should be sold in packs of 3 as a precaution against losing one.
Continue ReadingWhen my friends on Facebo …
When my friends on Facebook make Status’ about how annoyed/angry/upset they are i like to make sure i let them know where they’ve gone wrong with their grammar. Just to see the reaction.
Continue ReadingMy psychiatrist reckons i …
My psychiatrist reckons i suffer from extreme anxiety and paranoia But i don’t take any notice of him, he’s always had it in for me.
Continue ReadingI like queuing, my dad li …
I like queuing, my dad likes queuing, my grandad loved queuing. What I’m saying is I come from a long line of people who like queuing.
Continue ReadingI had a party the other n …
I had a party the other night that got a little out of hand. My mate kept telling me that he’d love a go with the older chick who was sucking off some guy in the corner, then doing vodka shots off another guys back. After she’d blown every guy in the room and polished […]
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