Friends help you find a g …
Friends help you find a girl in a club Real friends help you spit roast the 9 year old scout…..
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
You’ve got nothing too lo …
You’ve got nothing too lose and perhaps a lot to gain Not exactly what the parents of my comatose wife wanted to hear in regards to turning of the life support machine.
Continue ReadingI had to ring the kid’s s …
I had to ring the kid’s school today, apologising for them being late in and a little dishevelled, due to us sleeping through the alarm .. We were quite lucky too it was only a small fire.
Continue ReadingI woke up this morning an …
I woke up this morning and found that my hair had turned green and my nose was bright red. I must have slept funny.
Continue ReadingDogs Trust: Dogs die in h …
Dogs Trust: Dogs die in hot cars. In other unrelated news, I have sent my wife on a cross desert trip to Tesco.
Continue ReadingI was playing a racing ga …
I was playing a racing game with my son when I started to beat him, He’s got a black eye but i won the race!
Continue ReadingBBC news: Free schools in …
BBC news: Free schools in England set for extra 600m to combat poor maths and English results. Wow that’s nearly 250 million each!
Continue ReadingA word of advice, never a …
A word of advice, never accept a cup of Joe from a cannibal
Continue ReadingSo we were seeing who’s l …
So we were seeing who’s laptop could burn a disc the fastest. It was a disc race.
Continue ReadingYOLO. Carpe Diem for stup …
YOLO. Carpe Diem for stupid people.
Continue ReadingMy Grandad’s now moved in …
My Grandad’s now moved into sheltered accommodation. He’s gone completely mad and lives at a bus stop.
Continue ReadingI’ve decided to become a …
I’ve decided to become a Baggie collector… My Dad thinks I’m losing the pot.
Continue ReadingI can’t stand when people …
I can’t stand when people call me names. John or Eric would’ve been fine but my parents thought they were funny.
Continue ReadingGreat, it’s Thursday and …
Great, it’s Thursday and my mother-in-law’s cooking tonight. She’s being cremated.
Continue ReadingA lorry has just overturn …
A lorry has just overturned on the M6 loaded with Vicks vapour rub. Police have said there will be no congestion for eight hours.
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