What do Americans fear mo …
What do Americans fear more than the 9/11 bombings? Salad.
Continue ReadingWhat do Americans fear more than the 9/11 bombings? Salad.
Continue ReadingJust bought some counterfeit Mr Kipling’s. I must say, they’re exceedingly good fakes.
Continue ReadingNo Katy Perry, he’s not an alien, just black
Continue ReadingBBC News: Woman leaving nightclub was murdered with blunt object. She must have been hammered.
Continue ReadingSome people like them mashed, boiled or roasted, but I like my potatoes cooked by a Chav. Sauteed.
Continue ReadingMy wife said she’s leaving me because of my obsession with the Internet. Worse than that my son Google agrees with her.
Continue ReadingI couldn’t get my tractor back home from work today. I drove into a magnetic field.
Continue ReadingI kicked out my wife last night… It’s like licking out but uses considerably more foot.
Continue ReadingI just noticed that my boxers have a label on them that says “part of a set” … I am a little upset that I didn’t get the matching bra …
Continue ReadingProcrastinators unite!… tomorrow.
Continue ReadingCrying so much that I cant even think straight.. Just sitting on the floor blubbering Unintelligible jibberish in total devastation.. Yet I still have time to txt my friends this, post it as my Facebook status and Tweet it.
Continue ReadingYesterday, I put a bulemic in a washing machine. It was sick and twisted.
Continue ReadingI’m not bothering with any of the soaps in the new year. I know I’ll smell, but I just cant afford them.
Continue ReadingFeminists. If you hate men so much, why are you always trying to be like us?
Continue ReadingOwls really are wise. I just asked one what 235 times 12 was and he said 2820.
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