Category: wordplay

Some disturbing news – A newspaper, made only for black people, has just been released. Dark Times…

Terrible weather conditions at the Ryder Cup, meant officials brought out a ruling, that players could use ‘preferred lies’ … Tiger Woods immediately texted his wife, to say he was going for just a couple more holes after work.

I understand. You love to interfere and you are great at doing it. So what do you want, a meddle?

Signatures are just like life: It starts off well and then you just give up towards the end.

I keep my wife’s skeleton in the kitchen. I pray every night to the skeleton, hoping some food will appear. However, nothing changes, still bone idol.

Just got a message from my mate telling me he had won the national ottery. ‘Lol,’ I replied, ‘typo?’ ‘No, send fish now!!!!’, he returned.

MSN News; Trusted courier led the US to bin Laden. Thousand’s of troops, millions of pounds of technology, and all it really took was a nice bloke from DHL.

Did you hear about the painting contest? It ended in a draw.

My beloved golden retriever died the other day, so I had him skinned and his hide turned into a cardigan. Have to admit, it’s rather fetching.

People who say they shave every day are just bare-faced liars.

My mate just beat me at Kerplunk… That was the last straw.

As I drove down a country road I saw a sign that said “left to Bradford,” I thought “what a turn off.”

After a shake up at work I soon found my self on the managerial merry go round, I must work at the most boring theme park in the world.

Jedward are living proof that two half-wits don’t make a wit.

What do you call it when you go down on a virgin? The Hymen-lick maneuver