Category: wordplay

My boss was going mad earlier when he found out people had been taking sips out of his brew every time he made one. I told him I didnt do that sort of thing as it wasnt really my cup of tea.

“Doctor Doctor, I’ve got Leukaemia, can you fix it?” “Yes we can sir”

BBC NEWS: Schoolboy kills 15 year old girlfriend for free breakfast I guess she’s “toast” then

“You won’t like me when I’m angry. I will stain your life forever.” The indelible hulk.

Loofers come in 4 sizes – Small, Medium, Large and Vandross.

I was watching some Raw footage the other day Big Show vs CM Punk

The best thing about driving in the desert is that it will always be dry. It’s unlikely terrain.

I’ve eventually broken up with my doctors receptionist girlfriend. I couldn’t stand all the name calling.

As part of a Guns and Roses tribute act, I’m a singer Slash actor.

Two cannibals are talking over a stewing broth, one says, “Do you recognise him, he looks familiar?” Other cannibal says, “Not sure mate, I think you may have him mixed up with someone else.”

I’ve just bought my wife a booster seat. She’s really happy now as she can pop her head out the car window just like all the other dogs.

My Mum told me I would melt some hearts one day, she was right, but I hate working in the pork pie factory.

Trampoline: Lube for a hobo.

When couples have been together for a long time, one will often finish the other’s sentence. Rosemary West, for example

BBC News: Councils facing rubbish mountains. So, more like big hills then.