Category: wordplay

I’m about to launch an online taxi firm. I just need to download the drivers.

Imagine a world without made up scenarios…

Know what takes my breath away? Throat cancer.

I bought some really odd shaped eggs but now i can’t find them. I think they’ve been mislaid.

They say that Vigilantes take the Law into their own hands. I think I’ll be the Judge…

I just saw on Facebook that my friend is attending – ‘Singles Darts Tournament’. I can’t imagine it being the best place to meet women to be honest.

Just got back from the local chinese, what a nightmare! I only asked for beef, thats when the trouble started.

My ex-wife was shouting and screaming at me to open the door yesterday, but I instructed the undertaker to continue the burial.

Definitions: Pastiche… what Sean Connery eats in Cornwall Module…. Xmas with The Who

You invented Tipp-Ex didn’t you? Correct me If I’m wrong….

I just told my imaginary friend I’m pregnant. He said he’s made up.

I accidentally put my earphones in with the L and the R sides the wrong way round. Now all my music sounds Asian.

A haiku must be, seventeen syllables long, I don’t know why… though.

Next Halloween me and my mate are going as a plate and a bowl. Girls love doing dishes.

I haven’t quite finished my new book. ‘The A to R of laziness’