Category: joke

My mate asked me what I got for Father’s Day. “I got a golf ball,” I replied. “A golf ball. That doesn’t sound much of a present!” “Well that’s where you’re wrong,” I said, “This golf ball is impossible to lose and even floats if you hit into water.” “OK, I take it back. It […]

To me, A Sickipedia joke is like a woman. You spend ages trying to get a good one, and when you do, you sit and think about how you can beat it.

Whats got 6 teeth and 44 legs?? The crisis loan queue!

Life is more thrilling when you’re out there living it. I read that somewhere.

The problem with maths jokes is not the jokes themselves, but that if you get them, you don’t have any friends to tell them to.

As a london police officer, If I see anybody dealing or taking drugs in a public place I’ll nick em. Saves me having to pay for them I suppose.

Writing a good joke is very much like making love to a beautiful woman. Some people will just never achieve it.

The mutilated bodies of a boy band have been found today dumped at a Scottish beauty spot. Man charged with Mcfly tipping.

What is the most popular food in Africa? Dirty water.

“These roast potatoes are lovely,” said my sister-in-law, “How do get them so crunchy?” “I always use beef dripping,” I replied. “What!” she spluttered, spitting out potato, “You know I’m a strict vegetarian!” “Don’t panic,” I laughed, “I’m only winding you up.” “You swine,” she said, looking relieved, “You had me going there!” “I know. […]

Whats Grey And would look Funny on the Wigan Warrior’s team Bus? Terry Newton.

Anyone ever noticed that Zombie’s never tend to get full up?

I bought a Boa Constrictor and it’s really taken to my wife… Got a real crush on her.

I’m currently working as a computer games tester making 50 pounds a week! By that, I mean I’m on the dole…and I play a lot of Xbox.

My mother-in-law had just died and my wife gave me the job of deciding what was on the food table after the funeral. I am now divorced as apparently, “Celebrations” are not the appropriate chocolates to have.