My girlfriend left me bec …
My girlfriend left me because I never spent a penny on her. How was I to know she was into golden showers.
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Two ducks in a pond are t …
Two ducks in a pond are thinking about elementary particle physics. One turns to the other and says ‘Quark Quark’
Continue Reading‘…The next time the Pos …
‘…The next time the Postal workers go on strike, here’s a simple solution to get them back to work: Pay their salary, but send the cheque by mail…SORTED!’
Continue ReadingSome people are worried t …
Some people are worried that the Bee’s are dying out By the size of them this year, it probably because they’ve started eating each other.
Continue ReadingThe new African girl at m …
The new African girl at my school is really spotty. Or as I like to call it – blackne.
Continue ReadingIf your parents never had …
If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t either
Continue ReadingVirtue never has been as …
Virtue never has been as respected as money. That’s why i always prefer money.
Continue ReadingI just bought some new je …
I just bought some new jeans with velcro running down the sides. My mates think it was a stupid thing to buy, but i reckon I can pull them off.
Continue Readingin England theres always …
in England theres always something wrong in summer either it’s the weather or it’s the people
Continue ReadingI took my new girlfriend …
I took my new girlfriend to an exhibition at the Tate, She pointed to a pot and said “That’s an Imported Mycenaean stirrup vase found in the acropolis of Ras Shamra” I thought “That’s an arty fact”
Continue Readingscotch eggs must be absol …
scotch eggs must be absolute nightmares for vegatarians, they have death on the outside, and the potential for life within.
Continue ReadingThey say man who walk inf …
They say man who walk infront of car get tired! and man who walk behind car get exhausted!
Continue ReadingEvian has gone into liqui …
Evian has gone into liquidation
Continue ReadingI am getting pretty nervo …
I am getting pretty nervous lately. My little 2 year old nephew is starting to learn how to talk.
Continue ReadingI was overjoyed when a le …
I was overjoyed when a letter from my Psychiatrist told me I no longer needed treatment. “Thanks!” I said. “No problem”, it replied.
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