I got a rim job off a gir …
I got a rim job off a girl last night and I actually really liked it. I must say my bike wheels have never looked so shiny
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
My new phone has a very u …
My new phone has a very un-musical ring. It’s chordless.
Continue ReadingA woman walks into a bar …
A woman walks into a bar and ruins the joke.
Continue ReadingMy wife thinks I sound to …
My wife thinks I sound too much like Jeremy Clarkson. So I’ll try to prove her wrong. I mean, how hard can it be?
Continue ReadingA report says that a grow …
A report says that a growing number of Britons are worth 1 million. The bad news is last year they were worth 5 million
Continue ReadingI used to eat in my local …
I used to eat in my local McDonald’s all the time, but not so much anymore, not since the time I went to use their bathroom, and I saw a sign that said: ‘Employees Must Wash Hands, Especially Carl.’
Continue ReadingI’m gonna live forever. O …
I’m gonna live forever. Or die trying.
Continue ReadingThis bird was flirting wi …
This bird was flirting with me in the pub. “I wear a DD bra,” she whispered. “That’s OK,” I said. “I wear Tum-Tiddly-Um underpants”.
Continue ReadingWhich John Milton novel i …
Which John Milton novel is about why he can’t play Monopoly any more? Pair o’ dice lost
Continue ReadingWhen I was younger I aske …
When I was younger I asked my mum “What do you do if your cat dies?” To which she said “You can either bury it or call the RSPCA and they take it away for you” to this day I’ll never know why anyone would want to re-home a dead cat.
Continue ReadingI’m sick and tired of wor …
I’m sick and tired of working in this BBQ chicken factory. It’s time for me to spread my wings.
Continue ReadingWatched Dynamo yesterday. …
Watched Dynamo yesterday. I love how he bottled every trick.
Continue ReadingI’ve just won the nationa …
I’ve just won the national lottery, and Im gonna give my missus a ring… From Australia
Continue ReadingThis joke is like a rapis …
This joke is like a rapist. It’s going to score whether you like it or not.
Continue ReadingWhy are girls so against …
Why are girls so against Bukkake? They should take it as it comes.
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