I started chatting to thi …
I started chatting to this plump girl in a bar. “Oh God,” she moaned, “you smell gorgeous. What is it?” “Pies,” I said.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I bet Gaddafi regrets all …
I bet Gaddafi regrets allowing his iPhone to use his current location.
Continue ReadingI got a promotion today b …
I got a promotion today by simply attaching a mirror to my back. Apparently my boss could see himself in me.
Continue ReadingWhy’s Sickipedia like the …
Why’s Sickipedia like the toilet bowl? You should never show your girlfriend what you’ve contributed.
Continue ReadingI came round a corner thi …
I came round a corner this morning and thought ; “I really must get that seen too”
Continue ReadingBBC News: Hospital ‘misdi …
BBC News: Hospital ‘misdiagnosed patients’ “It’s early days yet, but we’ve narrowed it down to a broken wrist, or cancer.”
Continue ReadingI’ve just made a clock ou …
I’ve just made a clock out of sandpaper. Times are rough.
Continue ReadingHeather Mills has gone on …
Heather Mills has gone on a musical tour, her first round went ok, but she got a bit of stick for her second leg…
Continue ReadingI’ve almost finished my p …
I’ve almost finished my physics home work. I just need to figure out what force times distance equals and that will be the work done.
Continue ReadingMy impression of a stage …
My impression of a stage lighting technician is spot on.
Continue ReadingWhen travelling on the mo …
When travelling on the motorway the other day I saw a sign which said “Pedestrians in road – Slow down” followed by a ’50’. Usain Bolt… Practices everywhere!
Continue ReadingHow does the barber cut t …
How does the barber cut the moon’s hair? Eclipse it.
Continue ReadingWith the credit crunch up …
With the credit crunch upon us, I would like to thank all the charities for understanding and leaving us with free swing bin liners every week.
Continue ReadingOh well, I’ve Just looked …
Oh well, I’ve Just looked at the clock and decided to call it a day. Which is stupid because it’s a clock!
Continue ReadingMy philosophy professor s …
My philosophy professor stated that “The only certain thing in this world is that nothing is certain.” I’ve certainly tried to get my head around what he means. But I’m still a bit uncertain.
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