People think it’s strange …
People think it’s strange that I’ve only ever seen the beach once in my lifetime. I never watch films twice.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I was in the bookies toda …
I was in the bookies today, and I was quite surprised when my horse came in. A bloke I was chatting to, asked if he could give him a stroke.
Continue ReadingI was a whisker away from …
I was a whisker away from stealing an entire utensil set earlier.
Continue ReadingMy local post office uses …
My local post office uses four checkouts. Unless it’s really busy; then they use one.
Continue ReadingWhat’s really camp and ha …
What’s really camp and hates blacks? Millets.
Continue ReadingWell, back to the daily g …
Well, back to the daily grind for me. I work at a flour mill.
Continue ReadingI’ve been thinking of wri …
I’ve been thinking of writing a mystery novel. Or have I?
Continue ReadingI went to see the doctor …
I went to see the doctor the other day because I couldn’t stop writing symbolist poetry. Turns out I have a yeats infection.
Continue ReadingI was getting a bit lonel …
I was getting a bit lonely in the evenings, so I decided to advertise for a lodger. The Governor refused though saying I hadn’t really grasped the concept of solitary confinement.
Continue ReadingI used to have a business …
I used to have a business selling sculptures depicting just the head and shoulders. It went bust.
Continue ReadingAttention spans are getti …
Attention spans are getting shorter. I know mine
Continue ReadingI’m a Sickipedian and ver …
I’m a Sickipedian and version 3 wasn’t our idea.
Continue ReadingThe second r in the word …
The second r in the word ‘records’ is the second r since records began.
Continue ReadingAfter some of my students …
After some of my students pulled a prank on me, I decided to teach them a lesson. Since it’s my job and everything.
Continue ReadingI believe in honesty with …
I believe in honesty with my kids. When they say “Daddy, what will I be when I grow up ?” I tell them “disappointed”.
Continue Reading