I tried to e-mail my comm …
I tried to e-mail my commiserations to Andy Murray after he lost to Nadal yesterday but unfortunately I couldn’t connect to the server.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I’ve just bought a new De …
I’ve just bought a new Dell laptop… When I switch it on it calls me a ‘Plonker’.
Continue ReadingI had a roll lunchtime. W …
I had a roll lunchtime. Would have made it to the bottom of the high st. if people had moved quicker.
Continue ReadingIf TV series ‘Bad Girls’ …
If TV series ‘Bad Girls’ has taught me anything prisons are exclusively populated by bad actors. Lindsey should be fine.
Continue ReadingI intend to finish the da …
I intend to finish the day as I start it. Asleep.
Continue ReadingIm great at comic timing. …
Im great at comic timing. It took my mate 32 minutes to read the Beano
Continue ReadingA bus crashed into a tree …
A bus crashed into a tree in London today resulting in one death and numerous injuries. The driver is to be interviewed by the Special Branch.
Continue ReadingThey say if you play a Mi …
They say if you play a Microsoft CD backwards, you hear satanic messages. That’s nothing, because if you play it forwards, it installs Windows.
Continue ReadingI thought I saw a mobile …
I thought I saw a mobile circus today. Turns out it was just a fat bird in a maxi dress.
Continue ReadingGraffiti on the local cor …
Graffiti on the local corner shop in my neighbourhood PaKI PRiks Ou, ROBin ARe JoB Yes because it’s the immigrants that are stopping you from getting a job, obviously doesn’t have anything to do with your intelligence
Continue ReadingI want people to like me …
I want people to like me for me. Not my Facebook statuses.
Continue ReadingI was walking past a tram …
I was walking past a tramp earlier, but ignored him as i was in a rush. ‘How do you sleep at night?!’ he shouted at me. ‘In wonderful comfort thanks,’ I said, ‘how about you?’
Continue ReadingWhy did Ian Paisley carry …
Why did Ian Paisley carry a pushbike under his arm? He was holding a Raleigh
Continue ReadingThe Government has decide …
The Government has decided that cough medicines don’t work on children under 12 and are withdrawing them from sale. I beg to differ, I find it makes them nice and drowsy.
Continue ReadingI have just found a brill …
I have just found a brilliant website on how to improve your Ventriloquism. It’s Gubawue Gubawue Gubawue Got……….
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