There are so many more charity adverts on around Christmas. Basically, Children in Africa are starving. Any money we can send they use to build wells and teach the people hygiene and farming techniques. It’s amazing really how little it actually takes… To make me change the channel.
Continue ReadingMy friend asked my opinion on his new air-conditioning units. I said I’m not a big fan.
Continue ReadingA man walks into a library and says, “I…” The librarian interrupts “in the duplicate section”
Continue ReadingI drink, therefore I am.
Continue ReadingI’ve just found a portrait of a policeman in the loft. I think it’s a Constable.
Continue ReadingWhy did Surtees retire from the race? Because he got tyred.
Continue ReadingI picked up a traveller on the motorway and asked him the nearest place to get a chocolate bar. He duly obliged. Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy
Continue ReadingB&Q are next years official sponser for the Premier League. They’ve got everything! Except Hammers.
Continue ReadingAnyone else tried J20 after 8 pints of lager. I tried but still ended up going round the M25.
Continue ReadingSean Connery joined the self preservation society earlier. I saw him buying a tin of Ronseal.
Continue ReadingI really think Bacary Sagna should name his son Les
Continue ReadingI was shocked to realise I had lost two stones when I was at weight watchers the other day I bought four at the offy – a couple must have fell out the carrier on the way
Continue ReadingHaving a ‘writers block’ isn’t such a bad thing when compiling a book on stonemasonry.
Continue ReadingMy mate was saying how his car is ‘quite nippy’. But I actually thought it was rather warm.
Continue ReadingThe police really need to sort themselves out. I’ve just seen a guy on Sky News throwing bricks at the same police van for the last 6 hours.
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