My teacher called me a qu …
My teacher called me a quitter today. I nearly dropped my English lessons.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
Become an Archaeologist; …
Become an Archaeologist; Your job lies in ruins.
Continue ReadingI always tell people I ha …
I always tell people I have a child-like disposition. It sounds better than saying I’m a paedophile.
Continue ReadingI’ve just been to Thailan …
I’ve just been to Thailand and was very disappointed with their range of neck wear.
Continue ReadingMy wife left me because I …
My wife left me because I spend too much time at work. At least that’s what I think, I missed a call from her the other week whilst out for drinks with a client on our anniversary. I knew it was for real when I ran out of ironed shirts.
Continue ReadingFacebook: Proving that se …
Facebook: Proving that severe dyslexia is more commonplace than you think.
Continue ReadingI just wish I heeded my m …
I just wish I heeded my mate’s advice a bit more with my new puppy. “Take care with the heat in the car when leaving it on it’s own!” he said. Stupid me could only afford a two bar electric fire and it’s died.
Continue ReadingA sure sign that I’m spen …
A sure sign that I’m spending too much time on Sickipedia. We went to the estate agents, looking for a new house. The estate agent asked if we wanted a house with a cellar and I said, “We don’t really need one, my wife can’t have children!”
Continue ReadingCameron has stated rioter …
Cameron has stated rioters need ‘tough love’ – don’t worry Mr Cameron, I’m sure they’ll enjoy plenty of ‘tough love’ behind bars!
Continue ReadingMy wife wanted some help …
My wife wanted some help with her car, because she’d heard that making your vehicle lighter saves fuel. We started taking out things she doesn’t need. She took out some shoes and a blanket, and I removed the reverse gear.
Continue ReadingI went to my local bakers …
I went to my local bakers the other day and the guy behind the counter was balancing on some bread. I thought to myself ‘He’s on a roll!’.
Continue ReadingOur pet cat loves getting …
Our pet cat loves getting strokes. The kids love his lop-sided face, too.
Continue ReadingA man has been driving al …
A man has been driving all night and he is exhausted, so he pulls in to a park to get a sleep in his car. He is just ready to get to sleep when his window gets knocked and a jogger is standing and asks the time to which the man replies “it’s 7 o’clock”. […]
Continue ReadingMy 5 year old daughter sa …
My 5 year old daughter said all she wants for Christmas is a pony. I can’t believe she is only going to cost me 25 quid this year.
Continue ReadingAfter 23 years of marriag …
After 23 years of marriage, Phil Taylor has moved out of his marital home and Is staying at a hotel, I wonder how long before he checks out
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