Take my advice…….. Do …
Take my advice…….. Don’t listen to strangers.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I have just hired a toast …
I have just hired a toastmaster for my wedding next year. Well, I don’t want everybody’s main courses to be burnt.
Continue ReadingA bird shat on my head th …
A bird shat on my head the other day. That’s when I realised my new girlfriend was too kinky for me.
Continue ReadingI’ve just written a joke …
I’ve just written a joke on a message in a bottle and thrown it into the sea. I hope somebody gets it.
Continue ReadingI’ve fallen head over hee …
I’ve fallen head over heels for a compensation claim.
Continue ReadingStatistics are like a lam …
Statistics are like a lamppost to a drunken man. More for leaning on than illumination.
Continue ReadingHaiti: a cracking country …
Haiti: a cracking country.
Continue ReadingPeople sometimes ask if i …
People sometimes ask if it bothers me that a police station is right beside my house. I actually like it because if I get arrested in town, it’s a lot cheaper than taking a cab home.
Continue ReadingI am Anti-Protest.. But I …
I am Anti-Protest.. But I have no way of showing it.
Continue ReadingThere’s no point being pe …
There’s no point being pessimistic, it just won’t work
Continue ReadingRevels. A game of “Russia …
Revels. A game of “Russian Roulette” if you’ve got a nut allergy.
Continue ReadingEveryone always calls me …
Everyone always calls me ignorant but I take no notice.
Continue Reading“Where’ve you been?” aske …
“Where’ve you been?” asked my wife. “Running.” I replied. “Have the Olympics inspired you then?” she said. “No, the off-licence was about to close.”
Continue ReadingWhat do facebook and The …
What do facebook and The Samaritans have in common? They both attract the needy.
Continue ReadingI knew she liked Bukkake …
I knew she liked Bukkake – I could see it in her eyes.
Continue Reading