Just a guess, but I bet m …
Just a guess, but I bet most cyclops don’t subscribe to the ‘eye for an eye’ theory.
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As I was looking for the …
As I was looking for the toilets in a pub today, I saw a sign that said, ‘Fire Door Keep It Shut!’ “Don’t worry,” I thought, “I won’t say a word.”
Continue ReadingSome guy came up to me in …
Some guy came up to me in the street today and said “God, you look odd.” I replied “Well, so do you.” Guess that made us even.
Continue ReadingI was never christened, t …
I was never christened, thank god for that.
Continue Reading3 Nails + 1 Cross = 4 Giv …
3 Nails + 1 Cross = 4 Given
Continue ReadingChildline should be renam …
Childline should be renamed… I tried to order a few for weekend but they said they were going to contact the police?
Continue ReadingIn America – Fat camp: A …
In America – Fat camp: A place where overweight people go to slim down. In England – Fat camp: Matt Lucas, Elton John.
Continue ReadingFor just 10 a month, You …
For just 10 a month, You can reduce your annual salary by 120.
Continue ReadingI’m going to the cemetery …
I’m going to the cemetery with some coconut shavings to dessicate some graves.
Continue ReadingSo this isn’t a website o …
So this isn’t a website offering advice on how to cure common illness then?
Continue ReadingI go away on holiday next …
I go away on holiday next week. One of my colleagues has just asked me if he could come in my suitcase. That’s quite an odd fetish I thought.
Continue ReadingEvery time someone say’s …
Every time someone say’s ‘Expect the unexpected’ I like to punch them in the face, Just to check….
Continue ReadingThe Beckham’s new daughte …
The Beckham’s new daughter Harper Seven is said to look very similiar to her mother. And at 7 lbs 100 z, I wouldn’t argue with that…
Continue ReadingI ordered a book on the i …
I ordered a book on the internet the other day called “How To Have Absolutely Nothing To Do With Your Neighbours”. Unfortunately, I was out when it was delivered.
Continue ReadingA wise man once said to m …
A wise man once said to me… “Hi, I’m Dennis.”
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