I know I am not the only …
I know I am not the only one who only started “mashing F5” just because they were told not to, in the hope of causing some damage, and smiling when the site crashed for that very reason……
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
What’s the fastest way to …
What’s the fastest way to get stoned? Be a woman in Iran.
Continue ReadingI wonder where 90% of the …
I wonder where 90% of the homeless have THEIR accidents?
Continue ReadingMy friend has not been se …
My friend has not been seen for a week and has locked himself in his house! I thought he had OCD Turns out he actually had COD.
Continue ReadingI threw two DVDs at exact …
I threw two DVDs at exactly the same time to see which one would hit the wall first. It was a discrace.
Continue ReadingI love having my dinner o …
I love having my dinner on my lap in front of the telly. It means I don’t have to wash up a plate, but soup is a nightmare.
Continue ReadingWhy is it that the most i …
Why is it that the most important part of a voicemail is always the hardest to hear?
Continue ReadingBirth control pills desig …
Birth control pills designed for humans will also work for a gorilla. The fact that saved me a zoo sponsorship.
Continue ReadingMy boss said to me today …
My boss said to me today “You can’t bring your dog in to work” I told him “It’s not actually going to do any work”
Continue ReadingWhat has my love life and …
What has my love life and my steaks got in common? Both rare.
Continue ReadingI think my mate is racist …
I think my mate is racist. I asked him to record Sport Relief last night and I told him not to bother with any of the boring bits but just the funny stuff. I’ve just watched two hours of dying Africans.
Continue ReadingI thought I’d treat the w …
I thought I’d treat the wife to a round of golf today. Only because the course rules state that each player must have a bag.
Continue ReadingI thought I’d seen the gh …
I thought I’d seen the ghost of my dead girlfriend the other day. I walked into my lounge and she was just floating there, all pale and cold looking. Turns out she’d hung herself earlier from a beam in the ceiling and I’d forgotten to take her down.
Continue ReadingSomething strange just ha …
Something strange just happened to me when I tried to post a joke…there was something wrong with the duplicator checker; It Worked!
Continue ReadingThe life of a man sufferi …
The life of a man suffering from erectile dysfunction is not a hard one.
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