Why did the farmer put pi …
Why did the farmer put pink cowboy hats on his chickens? It was hen night.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
Eight suspected French te …
Eight suspected French terrorists, who were accused of plotting to blow up a university in the north of England, have had their verdicts overturned after new evidence proved them not guilty of any crime. The Durham Huit are set to be released this Wednesday.
Continue ReadingI’ve never blasphemed, I …
I’ve never blasphemed, I swear to God.
Continue ReadingA Leb entered an discount …
A Leb entered an discount appliance store in Box Hill and said to the Asian salesman, “I want to buy that TV.” The Asian salesman said to him, “I don’t sell to Lebs.” Angry, the Leb left, determined to buy the TV. He waited three days, grew a beard, and then entered the store again. […]
Continue ReadingAfter the service on Sund …
After the service on Sunday, the vicar atmy church said, “Please give all you can on your way out, coins are helpful but notes are especially welcome”. I was going to chuck in a couple of quid but I whistled a tune on my way out instead.
Continue ReadingAhh I love April fools da …
Ahh I love April fools day. Although I prefer to call it “tease the homeless day”
Continue ReadingI think I upset my friend …
I think I upset my friend Saeed when I started asking him about Ramadan. All I said was, “What do you do if you don’t know anyone called Dan?”
Continue ReadingHow do you know when you’ …
How do you know when you’ve spent too much time on Sickipedia? When your girlfriend and mates keep asking – “What’s up? You’re quiet this weekend! Haven’t you got any new jokes?”
Continue ReadingI saw two council road sw …
I saw two council road sweepers getting off with each other in the street last night. I told them to get a broom.
Continue ReadingLocal headline: March bri …
Local headline: March brings city to standstill Your move, April.
Continue ReadingHe’s got a brand new car, …
He’s got a brand new car, Looks like a Jaguar, Lets be honest, it’s probably a Rover 75 isn’t it.
Continue ReadingMy mate is really upset a …
My mate is really upset at losing all muscular control of his jaw. I said, ‘Chin up mate’
Continue ReadingIf Russia invaded Turkey …
If Russia invaded Turkey from the rear, would Greece help?
Continue ReadingAccording to reports, Gor …
According to reports, Gordon Brown is moving to cut nuclear subs. Wish he’d just leave my lunchtime sandwiches alone and get on with the business of government.
Continue ReadingRobin hood. What a legend …
Robin hood. What a legend.
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