qjoq.com – Page 1232

I ran into an old flame t …

February 5qjoq.comLeave a Comment

I ran into an old flame today… Singed my eyebrows.

Cannibals love a good bar …

February 5qjoq.comLeave a Comment

Cannibals love a good bargain. If you offered a cannibal a buy-one-get-one-free he’d bite your hand off.

So what if Derren Brown c …

February 5qjoq.comLeave a Comment

So what if Derren Brown can predict the lottery numbers. It turns out that I can as well. But unlike him, I won 2.4 million pounds tonight.

My wife told me she wante …

February 5qjoq.comLeave a Comment

My wife told me she wanted something 20 inches long, crusty, and full of sperm… So i handed her our daughter

My girlfriend’s been tryi …

February 5qjoq.comLeave a Comment

My girlfriend’s been trying to help me with my finances. I think I’d be better off a loan.

The definition of irony: …

February 4qjoq.comLeave a Comment

The definition of irony: Having your house burnt down by stress relief candles.

I don’t know why James Bl …

February 4qjoq.comLeave a Comment

I don’t know why James Blunt thinks that his name is funny as it is used as rhyming slang. Runt isn’t even that offensive

I was feeling particularly generous this year so I got a present for an Ethiopian child. A nice shiny two-pound coin. Apparently it will feed him for a month. Probably won’t do his teeth any good though.

I find attacking strikers …

February 4qjoq.comLeave a Comment

I find attacking strikers in football very offensive.

What’s the definition of …

February 4qjoq.comLeave a Comment

What’s the definition of an office dilemma? Having a raging hard on concealed only by your desk when suddenly, the fire alarm goes off.

I nailed the fat chick ne …

February 4qjoq.comLeave a Comment

I nailed the fat chick next door last night. No-one needs to know about it though. So long as I hide the hammer.

So, in America they have …

February 4qjoq.comLeave a Comment

So, in America they have set up a “rehab” clinic for people who are addicted to the internet. Think it costs about $8000 for a 45 day treatment, 10% off for booking online.