Author: qjoq.com

I think our local sewage farm has broken down. There’s a big sign on the gate that says ‘Out of Ordure’.

How do you get to Shepherd’s Bush? Up the Shepherd’s leg!

Here’s a hot tip: The end of my soldering iron.

I have an amazing psychic ability to find objects just before people lose them. Unfortunately, the police call it theft.

I stayed up all night watching highlights of the French Open. I was knackered this morning, but it had its advantages.

I used to be a cat burglar… But in the end, I couldn’t afford to feed them all…