Apparently, baby powder + …
Apparently, baby powder + water does not equal baby.
Continue ReadingI don’t have any idea how …
I don’t have any idea how to fix this hole in my jumper Darn it
Continue ReadingUK scientists have found …
UK scientists have found a new species of squirrel which are black. They are reported to be more aggressive and violent than regular squirrels. Funny that…
Continue ReadingLife would be so much eas …
Life would be so much easier, if my sat nav had an “avoid ghetto” setting
Continue ReadingIt was very dark times wh …
It was very dark times when I had insomnia.
Continue ReadingHaringey Council apparent …
Haringey Council apparently sent a foster child to live with airline bomb plotter Ahmed Ali and his family in Walthamstow. That’s appalling. Fancy sending a child to live in Walthanmstow!
Continue ReadingAn elderly lady asked my …
An elderly lady asked my friend for his seat on the bus today… I wouldn’t stand for that.
Continue ReadingMy daughter went to unive …
My daughter went to university to study ballet. She didn’t do very well though – she got a tutu.
Continue ReadingI’m like God when it come …
I’m like God when it comes to similes.
Continue ReadingI’ve started my new job a …
I’ve started my new job as a bus driver and I can’t help but notice how friendly the public are. When I drive past them at the station they always wave at me.
Continue ReadingI met my new boss today. …
I met my new boss today. She said, “I want you to know I’m a feminist.” I replied, “That’s great, I hate women too.”
Continue ReadingAt school, my friend push …
At school, my friend pushed the teacher into a cryogenic chamber. He was suspended.
Continue ReadingWas listening to MC Hamme …
Was listening to MC Hammer earlier and it got me thinking. Is there anything McDonald’s wont try to make money off?
Continue ReadingEven though I’m a monster …
Even though I’m a monster, I find it hard to fall asleep. I always feel like there’s something on top of my bed.
Continue ReadingGood luck to all the 16 y …
Good luck to all the 16 year olds getting there GCSE’s results today! And their kids getting SATS.
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