I just bought a round gre …
I just bought a round green jacket with a brown stem. Its an Apple Mac.
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I just got back from the Hospital, I had to have an operation to remove a Tumor from my brain. I have to say it’s a load off my mind.
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Something’s telling me I shouldn’t have wore this diving gear to work today. I think it’s my boss, but I really can’t tell through the mask.
Continue ReadingI knew a shepherd once… …
I knew a shepherd once… He was brilliant in his field.
Continue ReadingI’ve started selling Lion …
I’ve started selling Lions for a living. I’m doing a roaring trade at the moment.
Continue ReadingI fell asleep in a securi …
I fell asleep in a security installation factory last night. I was alarmed when I woke up this morning.
Continue ReadingMy new girlfriend told me …
My new girlfriend told me that during the first time we make love, I should take her breath away. So just as she climaxed, I suffocated her with a pillow.
Continue ReadingIf its an offence to imit …
If its an offence to imitate a police officer…. then why do we have community police officers …
Continue ReadingLast month was the worst …
Last month was the worst ever for my pogo stick business. Hope we can bounce back this month.
Continue ReadingThere was a naked mental …
There was a naked mental patient standing by the roundabout earlier frantically waving at drivers. If you ask me, he was a stark waving lunatic.
Continue ReadingI just failed my pilot te …
I just failed my pilot test Apparently 9/11 was not a good enough
Continue ReadingI thought Davy Jones was …
I thought Davy Jones was just sleeping. Then I saw his face… Now I’m a bereaver.
Continue ReadingI introduced my wife to S …
I introduced my wife to Sickipedia today and she thought that some of the jokes were just tasteless. I told her to stop licking my screen and get back in the kitchen.
Continue ReadingYou know the old saying, …
You know the old saying, ‘You break it, you buy it’? What if it’s in the alcohol section and you’re underage?
Continue ReadingWhen he was 6 months old, …
When he was 6 months old, my son used to ride on the London underground all day long. He was a test-tube baby.
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