Category: wordplay

I see that Russian civilians are protesting about their leader. They need to be putin their place.

Apologies. My posts about planking may have caused a fence.

How do you make a Paddy field? Take him off the batting team.

I threw out all my old calendars.. It`s taken years off me…

I’ve just bought an award winning dog, which just goes to show…

They say being a hostage is difficult… …But I could do that with my hands tied behind my back.

‘Boy 16 convicted of killing girl for free breakfast’ That’s very young for a cereal killer.

How do you make a prisoner laugh? Tell him an inside joke.

Turned on the birds-eye view on Google Maps earlier. Funny… all it did was label all the most expensive shoe shops.

I was going to think of a word beginning with ‘u’ and was 11 letters long. But I decided it was unnecessary.

I got in a fight with a load of kids earlier. I never knew goats could be so vicious.

That ‘fly spray’ is a rip-off. I covered myself with it and have been flapping my arms for 5 minutes but I haven’t taken off yet.

What’s the similarity between a very good clown who’s masturbating, and a very good, but predictable, joke? You can see it coming but it’s still really funny.

The manager of our local Nando’s restaurant died. He will be missed Peri-Peri much.

I’m trying to teach my son how to read the time without using a clock but still having no luck. I guess it takes time to do it.