Category: wordplay

Tattoos – Self Graffitication.

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

Just got fired from my job as a train driver. I was steaming.

I visited ‘Motown’ on a recent trip to America. Everyone had a really nice lawn.

One of the other anchors on my news show turned off my teleprompter live on air… I didn’t know what to say.

On holiday, I was approached by two shady looking characters. They sold me a lovely parasol.

When you’re drinking champagne out of a shoe, make sure it isn’t laced.

The Human cannonball goes into a bar. “Nice of you to drop in”, says the barman.

I am the youngest of 3 in my family. My mum and dad are much older than me

If I told you I wasn’t sitting I’d be lying.

Confucius says : Woman who spend too much time on bed spring , should get off spring

This guy was having a go at me today for breaking a CD of his. So I ripped him a new one.

I’m lucky, I can always count on my wife. She wears a lot of beads.

How many knives does it take to change a lightbulb? C’mon, just take a stab in the dark.

I found an odd sock in the wash. It asked me if I could wear it on my head.