I said to wife “Don’t put …
I said to wife “Don’t put that money in your mouth, it’s got germs on” She replied “Don’t be stupid, even germs can’t live on the money you make!”
Continue ReadingI said to wife “Don’t put that money in your mouth, it’s got germs on” She replied “Don’t be stupid, even germs can’t live on the money you make!”
Continue ReadingNext is lot number 049 – The statue of liberty. Bidding will start at $8.00
Continue ReadingMy wife didn’t seem too bothered when I told her I’d lost my front door key the other night. Until I explained that the house had been repossessed.
Continue ReadingI saw this girl last night and she looked amazing. An American would say she looked like a million dollars. But being British I thought that she looked like 659,674.12
Continue Reading“If I had a pound for every time someone said that” I would probably be getting paid hourly for being an english teacher.
Continue ReadingWhoever said money doesn’t make you happy obviously hasn’t ever played a game of monopoly
Continue ReadingMoney can’t buy everything – for example, poverty.
Continue Reading2011 has been a disaster for me so far. I’ve gone from a pretty decent salary to travelling miles and miles in search of temporary employment. I finally found someone to take me on but it’s at more than a 55% pay-cut. On top of all this my Missus has just told me she pregnant […]
Continue ReadingMust say, these postal strikes are working in my favour. The amount of “cash for gold” evenlopes that ive picked up from the depo this week has been well worth popping in to collect.
Continue ReadingPut 7.50 in a pot and get a stranger to do the same. Then offer them the pot for 10 and leave with them thinking you’ve both made a 2.50 profit.
Continue ReadingThey say money doesn’t make you happy: I’ll take my chances being miserable around the pool then, thank you.
Continue ReadingI said to my mate, “I’m very poor at the minute, so I’m going to join the army.” He said, “Why the army?” I replied, “You get a free haircut.”
Continue ReadingI was really excited about opening a savings account, but once I started taking money out, I just lost interest.
Continue ReadingMy wallet is like an onion. When I open it, it makes me cry.
Continue Reading“Each morning I look through the Forbes list of richest people. If I’m not there I go to work.”
Continue Reading