My girlfriend left me bec …
My girlfriend left me because I’m “a clueless idiot.” I didn’t even know I had a girlfriend.
Continue ReadingMy girlfriend left me because I’m “a clueless idiot.” I didn’t even know I had a girlfriend.
Continue ReadingIrony.. Its the second anniversary of baby P`s death! The Black eyed peas are at number one.
Continue Reading”Anyone got any jokes about salt?” ”Na”
Continue ReadingI don’t understand my local Tattoo parlour’s new promotional sign – ‘Ear Piercing While You Wait’. To be fair, I’d rather just nip off to HMV while they get on with it.
Continue ReadingI was looking at an online memorial of one of my old teachers and his wife. One photo had a picture of the happy couple together with the words ‘Our love burns like an eternal flame.’ I had to laugh. They died in a house fire.
Continue ReadingThere’d be a certain irony if Hugh Hefner died from Myxomatosis.
Continue ReadingBlowing his whistle, the Lifeguard sprinted towards me screaming, ‘No running or shouting by the pool!’ I hope the irony isn’t lost on him.
Continue ReadingOur local Superdry store has had to close. The mains waterpipe burst.
Continue ReadingPrince Charles has complained that modern people are far too materialistic. I wonder which of his palaces he was sat in when he thought that one up.
Continue ReadingMy girlfriend is still with me because of my obsession with lying.
Continue ReadingI was learning to be patient But then I thought, this isn’t worth the wait.
Continue ReadingIf u call a city Bombay what do u expect?
Continue ReadingOptimism. One day it will pay off
Continue ReadingMy friend who works for Royal Mail’s Customer Service Department said that they receive 1 million letters a year complaining about their poor service. Can you believe that? 3 million people a year complaining!
Continue ReadingI was gonna stab that Alanis Morisette, but all I had was 10,000 spoons when all I needed was a knife. isn’t that ironic?
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