Category: books

Loving the new Dr Seuss book. Horton Hires A Ho

I love my collection of Sat-Nav’s and map books, I’d be lost without them.

Gryffindor: I’m brave and loyal. Ravenclaw: I’m smart and logical. Slytherin: I’m ambitious and cunning. Hufflepuff: …I like turtles.

Details have been released of the film version of the best-selling book ’50 Shades of Grey’. The film will star James Spader & Maggie Gyllenhall, is to be called ‘Secretary’ and will be made 10 years ago.

Some authors write in first person and others write in third person. But I’m writing my book in fifth person, so every sentence starts out with: ‘I heard from this guy who told somebody….’

So Sickipedia have released an American version of the book. I imagine this is pages of yo mamma jokes with maps to McDonald’s.

“Star banned from leaving OZ” So you could say it’s like some sort of prison. Let the Old times Roll.

I can’t wait for Reading Waterstones is gonna be wild!

BBC News – “Nine arrested in 1 million drugs swoop.” I wondered what the Black Riders had been up to since Lord of the Rings.

I walked into Waterstones and asked, “Do you have any books on ‘How to stop impulse buying’?” “Yes we do.” “Excellent. I’ll take seventeen copies please.”

I bought a book called ‘Mathematics for dummies’. All the answers were wrong.

I went to Waterstones today to get a book about conspiracies. There were none there. Coincidence?

You know your career’s going nowhere when your autobiography is being sold in Poundland.

I was fired from my job as a proof reader. They gave me the McCanns book, I couldn’t find any.

I read a book called “The Swimming Pool”. It started off shallow but had a very deep end to it.