A man walks into a librar …
A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on band wagons. “Oh, everyone seems to be borrowing that one”
Continue ReadingA man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on band wagons. “Oh, everyone seems to be borrowing that one”
Continue ReadingShakespeare. Bullying kids since 1564.
Continue ReadingWhenever I worry that I’ve been wasting my life, I cheer myself up by remembering that I have never read a Twilight book.
Continue ReadingA man goes up to Quasimodo from ‘The Hunchback of Notre-Dame’. He says, “Hey Quasi, what’s that lump in your pocket?” He replies,”It’s a photo of our kid…”
Continue ReadingSusan Boyle has released her new autobiographical erotic book, so far its been critically panned for obvious reasons. It’s called “50 shaves a day”
Continue ReadingQuick money making: Sell dictionaries to the Yanks, but call them “crossword answers”.
Continue ReadingThat Jeffrey Archer looks like he’s got a temper on him. I’d hate to be in his bad books.
Continue ReadingI’ve just finished writting a song about my old girlfriend. It’s called “They’ll Find Her When the Leaves Blow Away ‘Cause I’m Not Raking ‘Til Spring.”
Continue ReadingI was reading this book today, The History Of Glue. I couldn’t put it down.
Continue ReadingI wrote a book on coffee. Without it I would never have met the deadline.
Continue ReadingDue to the popularity of “50 shades of grey” , a new underwear range will soon be in shops. Think i will stick with my own brand though…. 50 shades of brown.
Continue ReadingKim Jong-il, Bin Laden and Gaddafi all in the one year? 2011 is clearly being written by George R.R. Martin.
Continue ReadingI’ve just taken up speed reading. Last night I did war and peace in 20 seconds. I know it’s only 3 words but it’s a start!
Continue ReadingBOOK SPOILER ALERT: Wally was near the lion’s cage in the zoo.
Continue ReadingWomen up and down the country are giving “Fifty Shades of Grey” the thumbs up. And fingers no doubt.
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