How come if a dog crosses …
How come if a dog crosses the road, it’s fine, but when a chicken does, it gets questioned for the rest of his life?
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I got thrown out of the l …
I got thrown out of the local bookies today because apparently I don’t understand how betting works. What’re the odds?
Continue ReadingI might take my small bro …
I might take my small brown pet for a walk this morning. Lovely day ferret.
Continue ReadingI tried decaff last night …
I tried decaff last night. It’s the only place to get a decent cup of tea in Jamaica.
Continue Reading“Haha, I’m not really dea …
“Haha, I’m not really dead!” – M. Night Shyamalan at his own funeral
Continue ReadingI Lost my Donor card yest …
I Lost my Donor card yesterday and they got one of my kidneys before I could cancel it.
Continue ReadingI never thought I’d enjoy …
I never thought I’d enjoy philosophy until I found my nietzsche
Continue ReadingIf there are children in …
If there are children in need they should send them to my place. I’ve got a large donation I need to make.
Continue ReadingI’ve been married for 20 …
I’ve been married for 20 years, and it’s been the happiest time of my life. I’m just dreading the day my wife comes out of her coma.
Continue ReadingExecutioners – They’re th …
Executioners – They’re the guys to hang with.
Continue ReadingI tried fitting in with a …
I tried fitting in with a group of young raisins recently. Didn’t go too well. I guess I wasn’t current enough.
Continue ReadingSUN NEWSPAPER: WHSmith ha …
SUN NEWSPAPER: WHSmith has sparked outrage by selling a graphic manual on suicide (priced 11.99). Sod paying for that. I’ll get it from the library instead.
Continue ReadingA man on the TV is compla …
A man on the TV is complaining because he hasn’t slept for 3 months. Why would anyone want to sleep for 3 months?
Continue ReadingHow d’you make a witch it …
How d’you make a witch itch? Take away her W. How d’you make my girlfriend itch? Take away her B.
Continue ReadingThey say music increases …
They say music increases intelligence. I’ve been a studious pupil of the pink oboe for years.
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