qjoq.com – Page 824

My new house is very smal …

January 20qjoq.comLeave a Comment

My new house is very small which is great news for my cat.

I tried smoking cigarette …

January 20qjoq.comLeave a Comment

I tried smoking cigarettes as a teen. Unfortunately, with my bald head and huge beard, I wasn’t very convincing.

I got lost trying to sail …

January 20qjoq.comLeave a Comment

I got lost trying to sail round the coast of Alaska. I couldn’t have had the Bering Strait.

My mates and I went out l …

January 20qjoq.comLeave a Comment

My mates and I went out last night and got absolutely smashed. That’s the problem when you’re a mirror.

I’m going to take a picture of my firstborn and use age progression software to figure out what he’ll look like when he’s 16. Then I’m going to frame the picture and keep it as a centerpiece in our house, something he’ll grow up looking at. Then when the appropriate time comes, he will realize […]

Tip: Don’t tell the peopl …

January 19qjoq.comLeave a Comment

Tip: Don’t tell the people in your office your Sickipedia username. I did and now this black guy who sits opposite me is giving me right evils.

My wife absolutely stops …

January 19qjoq.comLeave a Comment

My wife absolutely stops at nothing. Especially now I’ve removed the brakes from her car.

We have too many superher …

January 19qjoq.comLeave a Comment

We have too many superheroes around here. The latest one is Superfluous.

What’s the difference bet …

January 19qjoq.comLeave a Comment

What’s the difference between men and women? One gets morning sickness, the other gets morning stiffness. What do they have in common? Neither of them care about the other’s problem.

I was chatting with a gir …

January 19qjoq.comLeave a Comment

I was chatting with a girl on Facebook this morning. “4,831 Friends? Cool.” I said. “Yeah, I’m going to make a new profile as soon as I reach 5,000.” “Hmmmm..” “What do you got?”, she asked. “Not much”, I replied. “Just a life.”