Author: qjoq.com

I said to my mate, “Ooh have you tried that new lemon flavoured lager?” He said, “No, is it bitter?” I said, “No, I just said, it’s lager.”

LFC News: ‘Carroll will remember elbow’ Well, it would be tragic if he left one of them behind.

All these teenagers around the UK calling themselves ‘The Swindon Crew’ or ‘The Stoke Crew’. Anyone spared a thought for the poor lads in Crewe?

I was over an hour late for work this morning. When I arrived the boss stormed over and snapped, “What’s your excuse this time Matthew?” “Sorry sir,” I replied. “I missed the bus.” He said, “Well make sure you’re more punctual in future.” I said, “Sorry sir comma I missed the bus full stop”

Firefighters are on standby at the Swan Vesta factory after the workers threatened an all out strike.

My mate accused me of exaggerating the scores at Scrabble last night. I think he had a point.

The recent cancellation of Sonisphere was disconcerting.

This bloke in the sauna keeps telling everyone to get out? Talk about selfish steam issues!