I draw the line at vomit …
I draw the line at vomit jokes, they’re just sick.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I was buying some hydroch …
I was buying some hydrochloric acid the other day and asked the bloke how much it was. “Including the vat?” He said. “Yes,” I replied. “Otherwise, what would I keep it in?”
Continue ReadingHow did the butcher intro …
How did the butcher introduce his wife? Meet Pattie.
Continue ReadingAfter our divorce my wife …
After our divorce my wife took me to the cleaners. A lift was the least she could do after being awarded the family car.
Continue ReadingMaj. Nidal Malik Hasan ha …
Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan has denied any wrongdoing in the Fort Hood shooting: “All I said was, Who wants my Loaded magazine? 13 people put their hands up, so I let them have it.”
Continue ReadingI’m getting sick and tire …
I’m getting sick and tired of all this whitehaven nonsense. That’s why I’ve insisted that my girlfriend gets an all over tan this summer.
Continue ReadingMy girlfriend’s weird. On …
My girlfriend’s weird. One day she asked me, “If you could know how and when you were going to die, would you want to know?” I said, “No.” She said, “Okay, forget it.”
Continue ReadingWhile driving I had an ac …
While driving I had an accident with a magician. It wasn’t my fault – he came out of nowhere.
Continue ReadingDue to the rising prices …
Due to the rising prices of everyday items, iv had to milk my cereal for every penny.
Continue ReadingThe man who came up with …
The man who came up with estimation has died…. His funerals due to take place round about Wednesday next week.
Continue ReadingMy wife’s constantly maki …
My wife’s constantly making sarcastic comments about my receding hairline. It’s starting to wear a little thin.
Continue ReadingIn Arabic countries the w …
In Arabic countries the word ‘freedom’ isn’t even in the dictionary. That’s because it’s an English word, and they use Arabic.
Continue ReadingYou know when dumb girls …
You know when dumb girls get excited and flap their hands near their ears? I’ve figured out what that is… That’s how you refill an airhead.
Continue Readingq uo poq nq s s s …
q uo poq nq s s s
Continue ReadingUpskirts Because asking h …
Upskirts Because asking her to show you would be rude.
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