Sickipedia duplicate chec …
Sickipedia duplicate checker, made in China.
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I told my Son that I thou …
I told my Son that I thought he should be a binman….. He Refused.
Continue ReadingMe and my mate have just …
Me and my mate have just had a big fall out. He’s just been involved in a major car crash which left him with a paralysed spine a dead mum and dad and a written off car. Apparently asking him when he’s going to upload the pics on to facebook is unacceptable
Continue ReadingI’ve been looking into th …
I’ve been looking into the pros and cons of optical laser surgery. It’s been a real eye opener.
Continue ReadingI was at the motorway ser …
I was at the motorway services the other day when a man in a yellow coat shouted over to me, “Are you with the AA, sir?”. I shouted back at him, “Do I look like an alcoholic!”
Continue ReadingI’ve got something that t …
I’ve got something that turns on all women. My american pitbull terrier.
Continue ReadingRonnie O’Sullivan has bee …
Ronnie O’Sullivan has been described as having the greatest cue action in the world. I’m not convinced there’s much of an art tostanding in a line and waiting your turn.
Continue ReadingI went to the dentist tod …
I went to the dentist today to have a tooth removed. Before he started he put on some headphones. I said, “What have you put them on for?” He replied, “I bought some cheap anesthetic that should be strong enough, but I’ve put these on just to be on the safe side.”
Continue ReadingJust found out my cleaner …
Just found out my cleaner is also a tailor… Turns out she’s Maid to Measure
Continue ReadingThe teacher says: “If you …
The teacher says: “If you kids in the last row could be a little bit more quiet like the ones in middle reading comics, then the kids in the front row could sleep much better.”
Continue ReadingThe other day, I visited …
The other day, I visited an old people’s home as part of my community service. I asked one of the old men, “How do you feel living here?” He replied, “I feel like a new born baby.” I thought, “How wonderful,” and asked him, “Why do you feel that way?” To which he replied, “I’ve […]
Continue ReadingMy bank balance is a ?. I …
My bank balance is a ?. I guess that makes me a questionnaire.
Continue ReadingAfter working out with my …
After working out with my coach, we went to a club and the bouncer said “Sorry mate, no trainers.” So I told him to go home and walked in.
Continue ReadingJokes about controls. The …
Jokes about controls. They’re not even remotely funny.
Continue ReadingThere’s to be a Hollywood …
There’s to be a Hollywood remake of Mario Balotelli’s horror challenge today. “The Shinning”.
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