I’m having trouble access …
I’m having trouble accessing the Glade website. It keeps telling me to get some sort of plug-in.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
The police came around to …
The police came around to arrest me due to the negligence of my housebound son… Luckily I wasn’t home.
Continue ReadingI went for a job intervie …
I went for a job interview at a large clothes retail outlet. It was going quite well when she said, “You will be situated in our super sized section so you will be catering for the larger woman, is this something that appeals to you?” “Only after a few pints.” I winked.
Continue ReadingStarted up as a self empl …
Started up as a self employed hitman recently. Business is great. I’ve been making a killing.
Continue ReadingAfter a swim today I was …
After a swim today I was in the changing room, when I noticed a Father and child in the corner. The little boy was trying to put his shorts on, but the priest kept pulling them down.
Continue ReadingI’ve just put my clock ba …
I’ve just put my clock backwards. Didn’t help at all, can’t see the time now…
Continue ReadingRecent evidence shows tha …
Recent evidence shows that Princess Dianas’ driver was on drugs at the time of the crash. Speed and Smack.
Continue Readingsataday night in my house …
sataday night in my house is when me an the misses experiement in the bedroom. tonight were going to see the effects when you combine zinc and hydrochloric acid
Continue ReadingI used to be obsessed wit …
I used to be obsessed with Posh Spice. I can’t believe how much money I spent on saffron.
Continue ReadingDid you hear about the ch …
Did you hear about the chicken that got further than the other side? It was beyond a joke.
Continue ReadingWhilst we were driving ho …
Whilst we were driving home I was trying to show my wife the correct use of the throttle. It’s by far the best way to shut the kids up.
Continue ReadingI thought I’d caught my n …
I thought I’d caught my neighbour spying on me with their binoculars last night. It was just my reflection in their bedroom mirror though.
Continue ReadingThat’s odd. Every time I …
That’s odd. Every time I pick up my pint of beer I feel a draught.
Continue ReadingI can’t be bothered to or …
I can’t be bothered to organise my sons first birthday party. Any suggestions as to what I should do? He’s 14.
Continue ReadingI killed a man with a bea …
I killed a man with a beard today. Looking back, it was a poor weapon choice.
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