Went shopping with my other half earlier and she went to try some dresses on and wanted my opinion. “Do I look good in this one?” She asked “Nope” “This one?” “nope” and so i went on for half and hour until she finally said “Surely I must look good in something?” “Yes” I said […]
Continue ReadingJust bought a feather duster. If there’s one thing I can’t stand it’s filthy chickens.
Continue ReadingA dolphin will jump out of the water for a piece of fish………. imagine what he’d do for some chips!?
Continue ReadingI like my women how i like my clothes shop dummies. Decapitated.
Continue ReadingIrish people like their deodorant to be sure.
Continue ReadingIf your ex dies, that makes her an ex ex? If you killed her during kinky foreplay… is she a triple ex?
Continue ReadingWhat’s the difference between the All Blacks and a teabag? The teabag stays in the cup longer!
Continue ReadingHave you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?
Continue ReadingI went up to this gorgeous Redhead last night, “Hi there, does the collar match the cuffs?” I said with a cheeky wink “Of course it does, this blouse wasn’t cheap ya know!” Turns out she was a natural blonde…
Continue ReadingI was at a nightclub and standing by the door. The Bouncer came over and said, “You have to move you’re blocking the fire exit,” As though if there was a fire I wasn’t going to run.
Continue ReadingI should have been sad when the batteries in my flashlight died, but I was delighted.
Continue ReadingWhy is a building called a building when its already been built?
Continue ReadingThe popemobile is useless. Not enough free texts.
Continue ReadingWent to Rome the other day, it got me thinking. What did Michelangelo do with the other fifteen chapels?
Continue Reading“BBC News: UK Rapist in Austraila sent home” His parents are said to be furious and he’s not allowed back to school for two weeks…
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