Roy walkers opinion on 7U …
Roy walkers opinion on 7UP , ” Its good , but its not sprite “
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
My Italian neighbour came …
My Italian neighbour came up to me this morning and said, “I’ve died your-a-cat ginger.” “You dyed him? But he was ginger in the first place.” “Sorry, my english, she no-a-that good, I mean your-a ginger cat died. I hit her with-a-the lawnmower.”
Continue ReadingMy mates all say I’m a bi …
My mates all say I’m a bit of a pub scarecrow. I stand in the corner and frighten all the birds.
Continue ReadingThere’s a lot to be said …
There’s a lot to be said for being loquacious
Continue ReadingA simile is like a metaph …
A simile is like a metaphor.
Continue ReadingI just found a cask of Ni …
I just found a cask of Nitrous oxide. It’s a right barrel of laughs
Continue ReadingI met an American in the …
I met an American in the pub last night who seemed to think he could work out people’s names by how they smell. He wasn’t very good at it though; my name is Paul but he said I smell like a John.
Continue ReadingSince Sickipedia is now b …
Since Sickipedia is now been over run by kids, can I be the first to say, Do any of you want to see my puppies?
Continue ReadingThis afternoon I am going …
This afternoon I am going to recreate famous scenes from “Raiders of the Lost Ark”. Right, who wants to get the ball rolling?
Continue ReadingThis tear-free shampoo wo …
This tear-free shampoo works great, but I still really miss my dead parents
Continue ReadingI find it shocking that p …
I find it shocking that people continually refer to the Williams sisters as dogs. Dogs are generally very intelligent and a pleasure to have around – they certainly don’t deserve that kind of slur!
Continue ReadingYou can avoid almost any …
You can avoid almost any profession if you know which fruit to use. A lychee a day, for example, keeps the plumber away.
Continue ReadingThe other day my mate sai …
The other day my mate said to me, “If I was a McDonald’s meal, which one would I be?” So I stopped and thought for a little while and replied, “A Fillet-O-Fish: you’re always there but no one really likes you.”
Continue ReadingWhat has my daughter got …
What has my daughter got in common with my garden? The family dog is happy to bury his bone in either.
Continue ReadingMy mate and I were sniffi …
My mate and I were sniffing cocaine off of a newspaper last night, and rather ironically the page we were snorting from was an editorial about the dangers casual drug use. I thought it was more than sheer coincidence, but I suppose you could say I was reading between the lines
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