Why couldn’t ants get int …
Why couldn’t ants get into Club Doughnut? It was jam packed.
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My wife said to me the ot …
My wife said to me the other day, “Is it just me or does the world seem a smaller place?” “Try looking through the right end of the binoculars,” I replied.
Continue ReadingI find it really hard to …
I find it really hard to keep secrets, so I ask people to help me.
Continue ReadingA police woman pulled up …
A police woman pulled up outside the house this morning. I thought, nice knickers but she shouldn’t really be doing that on duty.
Continue ReadingThis new magazine was tur …
This new magazine was turning me on so much. I couldn’t help but let out a loud moan of pleasure as I shot my load all over the centre pages. As I stood there, out of breath, and sweating heavily, I realised that I love my job in construction too much. And, I’m never allowed […]
Continue ReadingWent to Mars on holiday l …
Went to Mars on holiday last week and painted the town red. Couldn’t find it again after that.
Continue ReadingWatered down Booze. That’ …
Watered down Booze. That’ll dampen the Spirits.
Continue ReadingSandwich makers have many …
Sandwich makers have many rolls to fill.
Continue ReadingI brought a card table to …
I brought a card table today… On reflection, a wooden one would’ve been better.
Continue ReadingWhen my girlfriend got he …
When my girlfriend got her new kitten, she said that she wished it would be that cute forever. She’s going to be so surprised when I get it stuffed for her birthday.
Continue ReadingMobiles: A way to speak t …
Mobiles: A way to speak to yourself without anyone noticing.
Continue ReadingWhat’s one thing you neve …
What’s one thing you never want to hear your dentist say? “Oops. Wow, you really are numb!”
Continue ReadingFat is the only problem y …
Fat is the only problem you can run away from.
Continue ReadingArmour and helmet half pr …
Armour and helmet half price: for one knight only.
Continue ReadingI’m not the type of perso …
I’m not the type of person who holds grudges. My father was and I will always hate him for that.
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