Asymptotes. Can’t touch t …
Asymptotes. Can’t touch this.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I found out today that do …
I found out today that don’t like cliche’s… I guess you learn something new every day.
Continue ReadingLife is a lot like an unf …
Life is a lot like an unfinished joke, because it always makes people really
Continue ReadingThere are two secrets to …
There are two secrets to life, let me tell you what they are. 1. Don’t tell anyone everything you know…
Continue ReadingSo what separates us from …
So what separates us from the animals? I think it’s the wardens at the zoo.
Continue ReadingWalked in the kitchen to …
Walked in the kitchen to see my dog at his water bowl earlier today. So I quickly ran up and tried giving him a good shafting from behind. Before I could stop him he turned and bit me on the hand. He can give it but he can’t take it.
Continue Reading“bigger is better” no fat …
“bigger is better” no fatty, not in your case.
Continue ReadingLawyer – As you can see, …
Lawyer – As you can see, the headline reads, “Gang Wanted For Looting”. Judge – “& your point is?” Lawyer – “Well my clients were simply doing what they were told”
Continue ReadingWhat’s the difference bet …
What’s the difference between Hitler and Susan Boyle? Hitler trimmed his moustache.
Continue ReadingWhy is the corner of a ro …
Why is the corner of a room the warmest part? It’s 90 degrees.
Continue ReadingI’ve Just finished the sc …
I’ve Just finished the school run. I won it fairly easily, they’re only 7
Continue ReadingOkay, so I’m eating out w …
Okay, so I’m eating out with the wife at some restaurant and I’m sporting my new Van Heusen dinner jacket. I happen to be quite proud of it, but she just wouldn’t stop moaning… “I just think you look… silly, you look silly” She said, tucking into her salad. “What?! Cost me 120 this did…” […]
Continue ReadingAt the lab today we mixed …
At the lab today we mixed nitrous oxide with mustard gas. God it was great – we laughed until we cried!
Continue ReadingWhen I woke up this morni …
When I woke up this morning my wife asked me did I sleep well? I said no, I made a few mistakes.
Continue ReadingMy dad put all his trust …
My dad put all his trust in me when I took over his gasket business but I blew it.
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