The day that Microsoft cr …
The day that Microsoft creates a product that doesn’t suck is the day that they venture into the vacuum cleaner industry
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I just read in the news ” …
I just read in the news “Chelsea sack Villas Boas” What on earth were they doing with the Barcelona striker’s snakes in the first place??
Continue ReadingMe and the lads went on a …
Me and the lads went on a ‘pull a pig’ contest. I was declared the winner when I got back from the farm. The farmers wife is a right minger.
Continue ReadingWe put our kids to sleep …
We put our kids to sleep by tossing them in the air. Of course, you have to have low ceilings for this method to work.
Continue ReadingThe games box said, “Need …
The games box said, “Needs Windows Vista, XP, or better”. So I installed Linux.
Continue ReadingI remember going to the p …
I remember going to the park with my dad wearing a Donald Duck hat and a sailor suit. Why he wore that, I’ll never know.
Continue ReadingWhat’s the difference bet …
What’s the difference between my Wife and a Dartboard? Throwing Darts at my wife is enjoyable.
Continue ReadingI can levitate birds. No …
I can levitate birds. No one cares.
Continue ReadingMy mate keeps boasting th …
My mate keeps boasting that he can ride his bike in reverse. When I asked him to prove it, he started back-pedalling.
Continue ReadingGot told by my Psychiatri …
Got told by my Psychiatrist this morning that I’m both indecisive and a Kleptomaniac. I don’t know how to take it.
Continue ReadingSpecial Offer: Free TV gu …
Special Offer: Free TV guide and local weather forecast with every facebook account.
Continue ReadingWhat’s the most common ty …
What’s the most common type of owl in Britain? The Teet Owl
Continue ReadingJust come back off holida …
Just come back off holiday from Manama. The weather was strange , we had sunshine, snow, frost, fog, and hailstones. In fact we had everything Bahrain.
Continue Reading“You’re very possessive,” …
“You’re very possessive,” I said, through the vicar.
Continue ReadingHow do you make an octopu …
How do you make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.
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