I asked a woman the other …
I asked a woman the other day ‘what do you do for a job?’ she said ‘I’m a ‘stay at home wife” I said ‘that’s not a job…that’s any good husband’s advice.’
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I’ve just failed my cours …
I’ve just failed my course on ‘overcoming self doubt’. I knew I would.
Continue ReadingBlack people end up doing …
Black people end up doing crime, because they are incompatible with the education system. They just don’t seem to cotton on anymore.
Continue ReadingI’m pretending to the wif …
I’m pretending to the wife that I’m interested in the book 50 shades of grey. That way, she wont think I’m a pervert when the film comes out.
Continue ReadingI’ve just bought that new …
I’ve just bought that new Lynx deodorant – breadcrumb edition. The birds can’t get enough of me!
Continue ReadingNormally my dog eats my t …
Normally my dog eats my trainers but I didn’t know whales done it too!
Continue ReadingI was thinking of a place …
I was thinking of a place where water can be found that starts with a ‘W’ today but eventually just gave up. Oh well.
Continue ReadingMy Father once told me “S …
My Father once told me “Son, find a job you love and you’ll never work another day in your life.” He was absolutely right… I work for the council.
Continue ReadingI went to the doctor’s to …
I went to the doctor’s today and he gave me six months to live. He told me I should do something I’ve always wanted to do. Luckily for me I’ve always wanted to live to 100.
Continue ReadingWhy don’t you see any wom …
Why don’t you see any woman ventriloquists? They don’t keep their mouths shut.
Continue ReadingMy wife went to the docto …
My wife went to the doctor to ask for a facial surgery. He told her he’d make a 40% discount if she brings the dynamite herself.
Continue ReadingI just had to give negati …
I just had to give negative feedback to a top rated seller on Ebay. I ordered some new printer cartridges about two weeks ago now, and they still haven’t arrived.
Continue ReadingI suck at blowing up ball …
I suck at blowing up balloons… That’s probably why I can’t do it.
Continue ReadingMy teacher was trying to …
My teacher was trying to get me to answer a question on healthy living but I wouldn’t do it. He said ‘you’ll answer it if you know what’s good for you.’
Continue ReadingMortgages in Britain are …
Mortgages in Britain are getting more expensive by the day but you try explaining to a homeless person how lucky they are, they just don’t appreciate it
Continue Reading